In a fuddle

I propose to start a new party with political intent as of date. We will have no colour, no symbols and no secret handshakes. It's not as batty as it may seem because it will all be in the miiiind, do you see?Here are the main objectives:1. looking good2. minding your own businessThis is not even half as simplistic as it looks : Looking good and minding one's own business will solve over 85% of the problems we face on a daily basis. Whether in terms of the global economy or in our personal lives.On the importance of minding your own business - Sri Lanka's in the middle of an about-to-be-insanely-violent election process and minding one's own business will prove to be of the utmost importance - trust me. Remember also, that if the US had just minded its own business in the first place, they wouldn't have had 9/11; London wouldn't have had all those bombs and maybe New Orleans wouldn't have been such a developing nation mess-fest.On the importance of looking good - well, I can't believe have to explain this really!!! This is how bad it is in Sri Lanka. In the blue/ red corner we have a man with a dead fish on his face. He's palled up with two disreputable men that my mother would never let me bring home. Ever. Then in the green corner there's a somewhat poncy, lipstick wearing elitist with his paunchy buddy on the other.Internationally of course there's the fabulously handsome President Bush, dashing Prime Minister Blair and the beefy Senator, Schwarzenegger. Don't you agree that if they looked good, it wouldn't be such a chore to listen to them spout the drivel that they do? Imagine Uma Thurman chatting about Keneysian econmic theory or Angelina Jolie waxing eloquent about refugees (oh wait.. she does that already). Anyway - you get my drift.Back to my new party - amongst our key deliverables will be to let people get about the city withoutbeing stuck in what has become a common-place traffic jam. The economy needs to function. We need people to get about their business during the day and go home to their families in the night - that won't happen if they can't go for meetings and are stuck in traffic for three to four hours in the evenings. So no more strikes, rallies or silly ten day marches. Nada.Another important deliverable will be to ban all trishaws, motorcycles, buses and vans from hereon. If we have lots of excess vehicles once this comes into effect I propose that SLAID (Sri Lanka's Assistance or Industrialised Dimwits)ships them off to New Orleans and the surrounding areas. They need it more than we do right now.Excess drivers of the vans, buses etc. - will be shipped off as cheap labour to China and India. It's one way to get the dollars flowing inward.As for a name for this party.... I'm stumped. I have four options so far; 1. Sri Lanka Superficial Party 2. Jathika Lassana Urumaya 3. Janatha Prashna Visandhuma Pakshaya 4. Eksath Komala Pakshaya but nothing's really getting me excited. I can't think why.I'm just going to sit in a corner until its all a little clearer.